String Quartet Rules

I was sorting through some string quartet music in my old violin folder when I came across a sheet of paper outlining the "rules" for our quartet [incidentally, The Doppler Shift Quartet was how I met Air Boss--he was a violist and I, a violinist].

Anyway, I read these rules with a chuckle, sure that I had swiped them from somewhere and then modified them for our very amateur (but fun-loving) group.

I present to you:

Golden Rules for The Doppler Shift Quartet (March 2000)
1. Everyone should play the same piece.
2. Stop at every repeat sign and discuss in detail whether to take the repeat. The audience will love this a lot!
3. If you play a wrong note, give a nasty look to one of your partners.
4. Keep your fingering chart handy. You can always catch up with the others.
5. Carefully tune your instrument before playing. That way you can play out of tune all night with a clear conscience.
6. Take your time turning pages.
7. The right note at the wrong time is a wrong note (and vice versa).
8. If everyone gets lost except you, follow those who get lost.
9. Strive to get the maximum NPS (Notes Per Second). That way you gain the admiration of the incompetent.
10. Markings for slurs, dynamics and ornaments should not be observed. They are only there to embellish the score.
11. If a passage is difficult, slow down. If it's easy, speed it up. Everything will work itself out in the end.
12. If you are completely lost, stop everyone and say, "I think we should tune."
13. Happy are those who have not perfect pitch, for the Kingdom of Music is theirs.
14. If the ensemble has to stop because of you, explain in detail why you got lost. Everyone will be very interested.
15. A true interpretation is realized when there remains not one note of the original.
16. A wrong note played timidly is a wrong note. A wrong note played with authority is an interpretation.
17. When everyone else has finished playing, you should not play notes you have left. If you have notes left over, please play them on the way home.

Does this house look familiar?

If this is your house, are you aware that it's being "rented" out for $440 a night?!

This post is perhaps one of my more embarrassing posts as I'll share how I was almost scammed of almost $1000. Yep - I even called my mom to apologize that the Ivy League education she paid for still didn't "guarantee" me from being suckered by a scam artist.

To make a relatively brief story tediously (but hopefully helpfully) long, here are the details of my near loss (with the many mistakes I've made notated for your learning benefit--or at the very least, your amusement).

I was tasked to find a summer vacation home for my extended family. We all wanted something comfortable, clean, ideally near a beach or with a pool, pet-friendly, large enough for kids and adults alike, and reasonably priced. I found a few options on Craigslist (in hindsight, not the best place to be looking) and inquired about availability. As I waited to hear back from the home owners/listing agents, I forwarded the links to my family to see if they had any preferences.

One particularly responsive listing agent was a man by the name of "Richie." His quick email response was littered with tons of typos and spelling mistakes but he did get back to me quickly. I just assumed that he was quickly emailing from the road on his smart phone (Mistake #1).

His particular listing was the most attractive of all the options because of the sheer size of the house (8,000+ SF) and the very clean contemporary furnishings. The kitchen island in this house was bigger than my ENTIRE kitchen!

It was a good thing I did a bit of sleuthing (read "poking my nosey nose around in other people's business") as I found out more information on the property--information that lead me to discover the property was for sale and had been on the market for over a year. I figured the agent was trying to recoup some cash through renting it out as a vacation home (Mistake #2).

The agent informed me to reserve the place quickly as "there is a rush for this apartment this time" (Mistakes #3 and #4). In the 26 emails between me and Richie, he kept referring to the place as an apartment. Since when does a mansion with over 8,000 SF of living space on a lot size of 11 acres (that would be close to 450,000 SF....450 thousand!)constitute an apartment?! I kept noticing these little details but each one didn't really raise a red flag in my mind (Mistake #5) at least, not right away.

My desired dates were confirmed to be available (surprise, surprise) and the contract was emailed to me. The contract had tons of spelling and formatting mistakes (Mistake #6) - the teacher in me even corrected the formatting and spelling as I filled out the form. There was a pet clause in the contract and it wasn't filled out. I inquired about how much the pet fee would be and a couple of other things that were even downright ambiguous on the contract. Richie now seemed annoyed. He responded that there are no additional fees even with a pet and the cleaning fee was already included as with all other expenses. When I tried to call him on his number, which turned out to be an obscure upstate New York Magic Jack number (Mistake #7), I didn't bother leaving a message. I tried to Google his business and his name and check the Better Business Bureau website but nothing came up (Mistake #8).

Perhaps what clinched it for me (as if all the other indicators weren't enough) was the dollar amounts on the contract. Dollar amounts were notated with a colon, so my security deposit of $300 was notated as $300:00 and my nightly rate was notated as $440:00 (Mistake #9).

What a dolt! The light bulb above my head began to flicker on (granted it was a low 20 watt bulb). I went back on Craigslist and found several other listings with Richie's name on it. All his "rental properties" coincidentally were high-end properties for sale with photos posted on the internet. Undoubtedly he lifted the description (verbatim), details, and images straight from the listings.

Anyway, I'm now steering clear of Craiglist postings unless they also have listings with a reputable rental site. I feel like suck a sucker. Att least there wasn't a Nigerian Prince involved, right....?

What I'm learning these days

Okay - so "dog" is very much on my mind these days. Guess it has something to do with having a dog in the house and the fact that I've never owned a dog before. Let's just say that old dogs (me) CAN learn new tricks (or how to co-exist with a canine in the house).

What I've learned about myself:

1) I'm not OCD (I already knew this but others may not) as I only wash my hands only after I've petted Skye, or after she's licked me, or after I've touched her food (or toys or anything else she's touched), or after I've groomed her, or after I've looked at her. All other times, I don't bother to wash my hands.

2) I do not need to have a SUPER clean house as I see dog hair all over the floor. I only vacuum once a day (with the pet cleaning system attachment on the vacuum cleaner). Kids using the light-weight vacuum don't really count. Swiffering, using the vacuum without the pet attachment, and hand-mopping do not count toward the daily vacuuming as well.

3) I am not a control freak as I do let Skye come into and out of the house as she pleases, provided she rings the bell by our back slider and sits and waits for permission to enter/exit (and gets all her paws wiped before she enters the house).

What I've learned about Skye:
1) She's very sweet and mild (as long as there are no furry creatures around)

2) She is very well-behved (as long as there are no furry creatures around)

3) She loves stuffed furry creatures which (sadly) may already belong to 'Shroom or Lolli [note to self: I better tell them not to bring their precious George and Mimi downstairs where Skye will claim them as her own]

4) She does not care to fetch (with or without furry creatures around)

5) At the dog park, she loves other dogs to chase her so she can have an excuse to run top speed

6) She can jump really high (which is kind of scary)

7) She can poop white crumbly stuff after eating bones

8) She can howl (when furry creatures are around) and bark (which has happened very rarely so far)

What I've learned since becoming a dog-owner:

1) A mild, dainty dog can have a nasty snarl when another dog tries to take away a stuffed animal

2) Many people do not like dogs and are scared of "wolf-looking" dogs (our neighbor); Air Boss thinks it's the black "eye-liner" that makes her look fierce

Skye with her "black eye-liner" fierce eyes.

3) The staff at PetSmart are super helpful and great with dogs (I wonder if dog-ownership is a pre-requisite to employment with them)

4) Dogs do not necessarily die when they jump over huge dogs charging at them and land sideways on their head (another scary moment)

5) People are not shy in coming up and complimenting on how beautiful Skye is (I had an impromptu conversation by the side of the street as a truck pulled over; there was a 5 minute one-sided conversation as the driver gushed about huskies)

My favorite Air Boss and Skye photo taken over the weekend

(The Strand, Hermosa Beach, CA)